COUNT.HER.FIB.MONEY

Tonight I engaged two young U street urbanites in a tour of the lovely Lincoln Theater and Ben’s Chili Bowl. Thanking me with soulful “OOOOs”, “AAAAs”, and “dayam girl you strong like Her Cule Lease”…they paid me with a hundred dollar bill which included a chunky tip to my surprise. I gave these generous lads sixty dollars in change and deservedly decided to indulge my thirsty turtles in a delightful drink at ‘Wonderland” with some living socialites.

As I paid for my drink with my new crisp hundred dollar bill, I scanned the bar for attractive lads that I would perhaps converse with about donkeys and elephants that roam our politically charged zoo of a city. Unexpectedly, I was jolted aside by the bartender who angrily demanded for my arrest….

“This Bill is fake. You take me for a fool?”, he shouted. He squinted his eyes and called for security, “Get this girl out of my bar!”

Defensively, I pulled away like the sly swift flying squirrel that I am and quickly retreated into my shotogun Bruce Lee horse stance I learned from my dad in Karate. Putting away my “WHY-I-OUGHTTA” knuckle sand which fists, I quickly calmed down and was overcome with a sense of self righteous punk rock Patrick Henry… “DUDE!!!! I demand you let me go at once!!!!Give me liberty or give me DEATH!” I said.

Suddenly, the bartender transformed into the Queen of Hearts…

ALAS

In Wonderland, I stood stooped n stumped
while the beats of my heart skipped, startled and jumped
On the Grill, heated,
this bill had me cheated
the counterfeit fibbed me
I didn’t site see it!

cuffed slung n criminally treated
cops would have me arrested and seated
in the back of a police car,…
instead of my pedicab

NOW…what would my mother say?

OFF WITH HER HEAD
he said!
and i Wish it a dream
so I’d roll out of bed

But it wasn’t quite that my Destination DC BLOG FRIENDS!!! This really happened.
I was astonished by this unjustified aggressive behavior…. While I did not get arrested, I had my counterfeit 100 dollar bill snatched from my possession. I explained how I had been paid in this new crispity crunchity bill. I had no idea it was counterfeit. For foolish, fib infested, counterfeit MONEY which is circling the DC area like the Bubonic Plague—an epidemic of the past, let this be a lesson from the sly swift flying squirrel… Shaady… your Destination DC Tour Guide.
Don’t let this happen to you. Educate yourself!
Destination DC Quiz:
1. What is US Dollar Bills made of?
2. When the new 100 dollar bill was made, did business owners and consumers have to turn in their old bills for their new ones?
3. Where is the Federal Reserve Seal located on the NEW 100 dollar bill?
4. What was changed in the new hundred dollar bill to make it harder to counterfeit?
5. What building is on the back of each new 100 dollar bill?

Here is a video about how to tell the difference between fake and real 100 dollar bills…

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